Do you know these scentences?
„If you do not come currently we will go home without you!“
„If you do not eat your breakfast there will die many children in africa!“
„If you are not nice to your grandparents the wolf will eat you for lunch!“
This kind of sentences mostly is spoken in situations parents seem to be helpless in the face of little tyrants (and these tyrants are the product of the way raising them up…^^).
We often want to dash our little tyrants against the next wall in situations the helplessness comes over out mind;)
And often we speak faster than our mind can prevent us of doing it^^
By threatening to let the child alone we provoke the fear of dying in it. Babys know that they are dependent of us. So we cause something in our baby we did not want to do so…:(
And: Babys do not understand idle threats! So they always believe that the things we predict will happen exactly in this way.
Let´s try to think about this fact in conflicts. So we prevent our children of being scared of situations that would never happen!
So: We do the best by doing nothing! After a few minutes the baby will understand that there is no other way than cooperate with us and it will forget its own trouble;)
In one of our next posts we will explain some opportunities of how to calm down our self in situations our children begin to terrorize our nerves!
Greetings from Germany:-)
Mira and Deva